Friends

What do you think about a white lie? —Friends Dwelling

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The little White lie. They were used a little more than usual today. I admit I use them. They are ambiguous and subtle, and calm. They can be like a smooth river rock thrown so perfectly, causing small ripples of abuse to our spirit, but we should not be abused. The truth is we all do it. We use the White lie.  The question is “how do we manage it in our lives?”

White lies are needed in our communication with others, from strangers on the street to family members to lovers and friends. Do not let the White Lies be abusive to your spirit. They are part of communicating. But not a necessity. We always have a choice.

Through a mindful process, ask yourself —- will this White lie be beneficial? Harmless? Will I hurt anybody? Could I tell the truth? Do I want to tell the truth? Will it be a gracious gesture? Why? Who? 

What do you think about White lies? I know how I live with them. How do you?

white lies in dictionary – Bing

White Lie | Definition of White Lie by Merriam-Webster (merriam-webster.com)

 

Armando Chilelli —

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My father. Larger than life. Brighter than sunshine. Honest as Abe. Friend to all he met.

Armando Chilelli, 91, died on February 21st, 2021, at his home in Edmonds with his family by his side.  He was born April 16th, 1929, in Brooklyn, New York.

Armando grew up in Italy, in a town called Paola. This is where he fell in love with his forever love. By one look at a picture set upon a wall. He set his sights on Maria Teresa  DePaola (Sina); they married on August 28th, 1953. They celebrated 67 years of marriage.

Armando and his bride moved from Italy to Alderwood Manor, Washington. They settled and lived in Lynnwood for 40 plus years, then the last twenty years in Edmonds.

When moving to Washington, Sina had relatives to support the young couple’s starts. Armando built roads up on the Olympic Peninsula. Learning to handle large road equipment and machinery. He loved moving big piles of dirt. After a while, Armando decided it was time for him to start his own business.

He exhibited all the traits of an entrepreneur. He started a General Contracting business, A.C Builders Homes, Inc., that spanned more than fifty years of successful outcomes. He was involved in owning a Quarry and Cabinet Shop.

Armando was a creative thinker and often invented things to make life easier to deal with, and everyone that knows him has been exposed to his inventions.

Armando loved to golf. He was exceptional at it. He did bowl as well and was incredibly good at that, too. Armando was a watercolor painter. He took college entry classes to become skilled at his work. Many an art shows displayed his art.

He was a Master Gardener— growing many types of vegetables and plants. He was so giving with his bounty. People that knew him were never short of vegetables for their meals.

Armando was an advocate for issues and people in the political arena. Always doing what was good for the community.

There is so much more to add for Armando because he was a larger-than-life figure; everyone he came into contact with left a bit better off.

He is survived by his wife Maria Teresa (Sina), and his daughters, Luana Chilelli (her partner Marty Krueger), Teresa Chilelli-White (her husband Bruce White), Donna Chilelli, and grandson Johnathan White.

A private service will be held Tuesday, March  2nd, 2021.

There will be a memorial in the late spring or early summer to celebrate his remarkable life.

 

Friendship

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What does that word mean? I think about it all the time. I feel it is a word that has many layers. Like an onion. Or, petals of a rose. I think that I never — I say never learned what it meant. Growing up I had friends and my sisters that I played King of a dirt mound with. Or, played softball with a huge ball that hurt when it hit you. Sometimes these friends and I made forts in the woods in front of our house. I don’t remember if I called them friends. I don’t know where they all are as of today. I never kept track of that first layer of friends. But, I do drift back and forth from being on the big dirt mound — proclaiming I am “King of the World.”

Going through the grades of school I had friends that had the same interest as me. I don’t remember junior high. I was having some mental health issues and my memory is spotty at best. I did belong to a group of Campfire Girls. WO HE LO. Anyone recognize that mantra? I guess we were friends. We went to camps and I was a Horizon Girl counselor. I don’t know where any of those, I am sure incredible girls, are in the world. Another layer peeled off.

Then high school came. My friends were like me and very drunk with teen power to do whatever we wanted to do. I was a good student turned bad, the Principal told my Mother. My friends and I would go off campus in my navy blue Fiat station wagon and head to Denny’s. Where we would sit and drink black coffee and smoke cigarettes’. I also had a huge rabbit with me — Harvey. I did have other friends when I sang in a small singing group. But, only notes and singing voices floating in the air blending together formed the friendship. No, don’t know anything about that group. Another layer gone.

That is just the tip of the iceberg of how I had friends and developed friendships. As, I started my ladder of growing through the years I peeled off many layers. Or, I tossed many petals.

College I had wonderful connections. With girls that were like minding, loving and combustible with joy. I thought this is friendship. Running around together doing silly things like putting soap in the city’s fountains. Sneaking into the World’s Fair, drinking and dining at the downtown Wool’s Worth. I had in my mind through college that I had hit the trifecta. Friends. Friends. Friendship. Sadly, I don’t know where most of those incredible girls are that lifted me up with their billowing spirits. And, the ones I did keep by holding an invisible hand stretch out to them have passed away. I know how the heart thinks about friendship. It hurts when one is gone.

I am going to wrap this up here for now. It might sound pedestrian. More to come. But, would love to hear everybody’s ideas on Friendship and Friends. What word do you use about Friends?

We would like to know your answer. Probably (not possibly) there are more than one to this question—because it deals with the heart. But, maybe there is something that works or a new light on it that sparks a new way to forgive and forget? Read below:

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What would YOU do if another good friend and collegue told you of another very, very good friend that they were bad mouthing you to her and others?

  • Would you go directly to your cell phone and call, text, or email a message to set up a time to meet for just an innocent reason? Then ask the question, “have you talked to so and so about me in a …” Or, I forgive and forget.
  • Do you ignore the information and think it is blown out of proportion? Dismissing it with a smile and no verbal reaction?
  • What is your feeling about friends talking bad about you to others? Especially, when you think you have a golden relationship? Save it by working through the reasons? Slowly pull out of it? Abruptly cut the ties? Or, I forgive and forget.
  • Was the friendship locked in like family? Were there boundaries? Forgive? Forget?

Question to you: What would you do? Why would you do it?

What does the word Friends mean? Something grand? Something sweet and simple?

Love Your World. Create Your Space. Share Your Story.